It be that time of year again. Ye know what I’m referring to. The season dreaded by every bearded pirate on the seven seas: summer. To not coin a phrase: it’s hard for a beard out there in the summer. Ye gotta deal with the heat, the sweaty beard, and the dried out facial hairs. But fear not: the Cap’n be here to help with good advice.
As ye know, most of yer body’s heat escapes through yer head. That’s why ye should always wear a hat in the winter. Of course, because of the aforementioned biological fact, yer beard can be a bit problematic in the summer. The hair on yer face will trap the heat making ye sweat more. Now, here be yer two choices:
Ye can do nothing and just take the sweat like the true pirate that ye are or ye can neatly trim yer beard. Something ye should consider if ye got a ZZ Top mug. Nothin’ wrong with going from full-on woodsman to Daredevil in the dead of summer.
Another problem often encountered in the summer is the beard itch. Cause ye sweat more, yer skin gets more easily irritated and itches. As a result, ye may scratch more. Some swashbucklers scratch so much that they even scratch off part of their beard. That’s why, lads, in the summer it’s really important to keep yer beard clean. Mind ye, we’re not talking about cleaning’ yer mug with soap. (Laddies, don’t ever use soap on yer beard.) We’re talking about water and possibly shampoo and most definitely conditioner. Note that, use conditioner on yer beard. Why, ye may ask? Cause ye wanna keep yer beard (and the skin underneath it) moisturized. If it be moisturized, it’ll itch less. Ergo, ye’ll scratch less. Sometimes especially the edges of yer beard might give you trouble with the itch. If that happens, ye can dab some aloe on it. That should take care of yer summer itch.
Another thing us pirates like to do during the summer is swim. And that can cause a problem for yer best asset, especially if ye swim a lot in chlorinated water. That wreaks havoc on yer beard. So, matey, each and every time ye step out of yer pool, ye need to wash yer beard to get rid of the chlorine in it. Yer mug will thank ye for it.