The Handlebar Moustache

Ahoy, Mateys!

Let’s talk about the handlebar moustache, because it seems to be trending among pirates. What is a handlebar moustache you may ask? It’s a particularly lengthy mustache, which is upwardly curved at its ends. Historically speaking, this type of moustache has been around for a very long time. The ancient Celts wore it as well as some famous Wild West figures like Buffalo Bill and European royalty like Kaiser Wilhelm. In other words, if ye have a handlebar mustache, ye are in good company.

handlebarSome people seem to confuse the handlebar moustache with the horseshoe mustache. Don’t make that mistake, matey! A horseshoe mustache is U-shaped, which means the extensions are grown on the corners of the lips and down the sides of the mouth to the jawline. (Think Hulk Hogan.) Whereas with a handlebar moustache, the extensions are curved upwards.

If you want to grow a handlebar moustache, the first thing ye need – as with all beard growth adventures – is patience. It’ll take at least three months to get enough hair on yer mug to start shaping yer best asset. Remember that the worst mistake ye can make is to try and shape yer beard or mustache (no matter what style) too early in the game. So, patience, grasshopper, patience.

After ye have shown sufficient patience and ye notice that ye have plenty of growth on yer mug, it’s time to get to work. First up, ye need to comb yer moustache (preferably once a day). Ye want to part it in the middle (right underneath yer sniffer). That’ll train yer mustache to grow in the classic handlebar fashion.

Ye then might have to shape and trim yer ‘stache. Some stray hairs won’t fall in line. It’s not you, matey, it’s quite natural for that to happen. Here is how ye deal with those annoying strays: ye cut ‘em! Especially if they’re near the crease of the lip, getting rid of them is a good idea.

Next, ye have to shape yer handlebar moustache. The best way to do that is to pretend you’re an evil villain in an old movie. In other words, twirl your mustache. Afterwards, dab some wax on the ends, so ye can have the nicely shaped, upwardly mobile handles.

Good luck, mateys! And, as always, if ye have any questions for the Cap’n, feel free to comment below or shoot us an email.

Cap’n Jim

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