The Tale of Valentine Beard!

Ahoy, Mateys! You know what day is comin’ up. And if ye don’t, the Cap’n is here to remind ye – ‘cause if ye forget, ye know how yer lass is gonna react, right? (Hint: hide yer sword.) So, swarthy swashbuckler, Valentine’s Day is next week. The 14th of February… quickly, mark it in yer […]

GRAYBEARD: A Beardnificent Pirate Tale

By Cap’n Jim Blackbeard for Men    CAPTAIN PHINNEAS J.GRAYBEARD was in a proverbial pickle. Cabin wench “Voracious” Velia Vavoom, as always overflowing her bustier, pressed her cutlass to Graybeard’s crotch and sashayed into his face. “Who be she?” she demanded. “I can smell her all over ye. Who’ve ye been sticking yer belaying pin […]

Beard Care Mistakes!

Ahoy, Mateys! The Cap’n often talks about how ye can best take care of yer best asset. Today I wanna tell ye about some of the mistakes ye can make when takin’ care of yer beard. After all, as they say, ye learn a lot more from yer mistakes than ye do from yer successes. […]

Growing Your FIRST BEARD!

Ahoy, Mateys! The Cap’n’s been goin’ on and on about how to shape yer beard and make it all it can be. But we’ve been gettin’ lots of questions from first-timers lately… or, as the Cap’n likes to call ‘em, beard virgins. Pirates who have never taken the beard journey and are afraid of rough […]

BEARDS — and World History!

Ahoy, Mateys! Now, mateys, ye might think that you are only making a personal statement when growing a beard. But, as it turns out, you’re also a product of your time. Researchers have identified four distinct beard periods in world history: Shaving didn’t actually become the norm until Alexander, the Great (356 BC – 323 […]